By Tania Kotsos
UPDATED: NOV 2020
Knowing when to give up, and doing so in the right way and at the right time, is one of the most powerful steps you can take when consciously creating your own reality. This may contradict mainstream advice that beats the drum of "never give up" but knowing how and when to give up could make all the difference to your success, while not doing so may prevent it. Most people deem giving up to be cowardly in the ignorance that to "try, try and try again" may be the less courageous and less effective thing to do while also being a colossal waste of your time.
At some point in time we have all been faced with the dilemma of whether or not to give up on something or someone that we really wanted not knowing what to do. The usual advice is to 'keep trying' and to 'never give up'. However, never giving up on something you want or intend can be the most tiring, time-wasting and energy-draining thing you can do. In our predominantly action-orientated society, to give up may seem like a weakness, whereas doing so actually takes strength and intelligence.
Refusing to give up, no matter what, is sometimes tantamount to being strongly attached to the outcome. In contrast, experience has taught us that oftentimes by detaching from wanting something we give it the freedom to come to us. Even if you do detach yourself from the outcome, refusing to give up can keep you trapped in an ongoing cycle of attachment to detachment and back to attachment again. There is great power in knowing when to give up and how to do so.
Knowing when to give up is just as important as knowing how to do so. The time to give up is when you feel and know that you have done everything in your own power to achieve the outcome you intend. In other words, do not give up if you know that you have not persisted, if you have not been consistent in imagining your desire as a wish fulfilled or used other manifesting techniques or taken the necessary action in the direction of your goal.
Giving up before you have done what you can, is usually just a decision that it is too much hard work for you to bother with (and of course that's ok if you no longer want it). The problem is, that too often, too many people give up too soon and in so doing truly do abandon their dreams and intentions. Endeavour then to know when to give up so that you can do so wisely, knowing that as the personal you in the 3D world you have done everything in your power towards the attainment of your desire be it a relationship with somone specific, a specific goal or anything else.
Einstein defined insanity as "doing the same thing over and over again while expecting different results". Use this as your guide for knowing when to give up. In other words, when you find that you have tried everything (usually a number of times and in different ways) but you are still getting the same unwanted results or see that nothing is changing, know that it is time to give up and we look at just how to give up next. You are the only one who can gauge if not giving up is harming you and holding you back from fully experiencing your life.
Now that you know when to give up, the obvious but often overlooked question is how to do so. Giving up is usually associated with abandoning your dreams but this need not be the case. Instead, learn to see giving up as giving upwards. In other words, when you give up, give whatever it is you are giving up on, up to a Higher Power. The Higher Power is one that resonates with you. It may be The Absolute or God, your Higher Self, Life itself, the Universe or a Higher Power of your personal religion if you have one. As long as you have faith in something higher than the personal physical you, send whatever it is you want to attain upwards to that Higher Power with faith.
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When you have tried everything else, to give up is really the most powerful action you can take. Interestingly, the etymology of 'give up' has its roots in the old French 'surrendre', which means to 'deliver over'. In this case, it is to deliver your intention over to a Higher Power—this is the power of surrendering. So, next time you say 'I give up', imagine your intention being sent upwards and really ask The Absolute or your Higher Self to create it or sort it out for you. Then let it go and know it is now in the hands of Omnipotence.
To detach from the outcome you intende to manifest in your life is one of the keys to consciously creating your own reality. You can choose to detach at any given moment and when you do, you continue to take action towards the outcome you want both mentally and physically but with certainty and calm confidence. In contrast, giving up comes at the point when you feel neither certain, nor confident. Giving up is the last action you take towards a specific outcome, mentally or physically. Even so, whether detaching from the outcome or giving it upwards, both are founded on faith and both lead to the same feeling of freedom from attachment.
Your inner voice will urge you on or advise you when to give up—to stop and hand it over. Your intuition will always instill a sense of calm knowing within you, never panic or anxiety. When you are just too tired to try yet another way, just send it upwards to your Higher Power. Of course, you may sense that what you want is beyond your own personal power from the very beginning, in which case sending it upwards with faith from the start is the most appropriate action to take.
It is never too soon or too late to place the All-Powerful Absolute or God behind your every word, thought and action. In fact, doing so is your greatest ally when consciously creating your reality. When you know that your True Self is a Divine Spark of The Absolute, and that your mind is Universal Mind in its entirety, then you know that everything you think, Universal Mind thinks, everything you desire, Universal Mind desires, everything you will, Universal Mind wills.
When you are feeling so low or despondent that identifying with the Real You or your Higher Mind is out of reach, then hand it up to your Higher Power, just as a child would do to their mother or father with complete trust in a healthy parent-child relationship. When you hand it over there is no direct action left to take on your part. That's it! You let it go and you get on with your life. Any action that may arise will be intuitively guided. Have faith that the Higher Power knows the best outcome for you and be at peace with whatever that may be, including something better than that which you gave up-wards.
It is better to know when to give up and to do so than to live in hope in the absence of faith. Hope without faith is doubt by another name. Sometimes our refusal to give up is the very thing that prevents us from getting what we want. Know that handing it over to your Higher Power opens you up to the realm of miracles. In fact, to "let go and let God" is sometimes the only way of receiving that which you want so dearly.