By Tania Kotsos
UPDATED: NOV 2020
Learn how to detach from the outcome you want to see manifest in your physical experience. It is best to detach from whatever you desire to create because detachment effectively makes the whole process of manifesting your desires easier. It is the fifth step in creative visualization but the principles discussed in this article can also be applied to any manifesting technique you use while aslo being a positive way of living in general.
Whenever you are attached to someone or something you effectively strip yourself of your authentic power to consciously create the life you choose because you are living from the vantage point of 'me and outside things and people' with no true conviction in the belief that your reality is a projection of your consciousness. Moreover, you cannot be grateful or feel joyful or feel any degree of certainty when you are attached to the unfolding of a specific outcome. To be attached is really synonymous with doubt while to be detached is synonymous with faith. So let's learn how to detach by first taking a look at what attachment looks like.
Attachment is really a feeling of obsession with having to have what you want and if you don't then you cannot be happy. It is to place so much importance on whatever it is you are desiring, that you have made it more important than you, you have placed it above you. And when something is above you, you feel that it is superior to you and so you feel that attaining it is very unlikely because you are not worthy of it. Whenever you are attached to something you want to happen in this way, you are indirectly thinking of it not happening and so inadvertently send your creative thought power to your current circumstances that you want to change.
Detachment is a mindset. The essence of how to detach is to feel that you already have your desire in the present moment and to believe it! When you already have something, it's yours so you can longer desire it! Learning how to detach also means to be at peace with what is, knowing that whatever you are experiencing, whether wanted or unwanted, is a product of your mind, only that to date your circumstances are mostly a seemingly random projection of your countless subconscious beliefs that you did not choose to begin with and that you may not even be aware of.
The most direct answer to how to detach is to have faith. Not the kind of faith that is blind or based on wishful thinking. Rather that which comes from 'seeing' the invisible plane with the eyes of your mind, with the same clarity with which you see the visible 3D world with your physical eyes; and knowing that it is the invisible that changes the visible in time. Learning how to detach comes naturally when you internalise the truth that your circumstances are a reflection of your inner world and that in order to see any transformation in your outer world, no matter how miraculous you may deem it to be, all you need do is to imagine what you want, feel as if you already have it and believe it.
Panicking that your intention may not manifest is a usually a sign that you are attached. Instead of trying to desperately detach from your intended outcome in the face of panic, just take a deep breath, relax and gently tell yourself that there is no need to panic, that you are one with Universal Mind, that your unwanted circumstances are just shadows of your past imaginings that are subject to change through your imagination, and that your mind is the creative centre of your reality. When you gently remind yourself in this way, your panic will dissipate as will your attachment. When you first set out to consciously manifest what you desire, this can prove very useful in learning how to detach.
Do not confuse detachment with no longer wanting your desire or not being allowed to ever think about it. Of course, you are not attached to those things you do not want or even to those things that you have a lukewarm desire for. But nor are you attached to all those things that you already do have. Herein lies the paradox of somehow feeling like you no longer want something in order to detach—the reason you may feel as if you don't want it is because you believe that you already have it. You can only want and be attached to those things that you do not have but desire to have.
When you imagine your desire persistently in the present moment, having felt what it feels like to already have it and believe it, then any sense of attachment will fall away. This can happen in the first visualization or after many sessions. And if you happen to think of your desire in your normal day-to-day moments, gently smile knowing that it is done and be grateful.
You may find that your attachment is as a result of not being able to see how what you want will happen given the current 3D world circumstances. And when you can't see how something can manifest, you can't see how to detach either. Rest assured, however, that how something will happen is none of your concern. All possibilities already exist timelessly so when you imagine something you are simply imagining an already-existing possibility, you change your vibration to its frequency and hence attract it into your projected experience through the Law of Attraction.
Having an experience in a 3D Physical Plane means that a series of events must take place to shift from one already-existing possibility (your current circumstances) to another one (your desired circumstances) in order to maintain a sense of continuity. You cannot know what each of these events are from your limited 3D point-of-view. Some will be so unlikely or 'stranger than fiction' that you could have never come up with them by just thinking about how they will happen, but happen they will whether you can see the how or not. This is what the New Thought author, Neville Goddard, coined 'The Bridge of Incident'.
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Think about it this way: if you could already see the 'how' and it was immediately accessible to you, you'd probably feel little need to visualize your desire as you would set out to attain it. Leave the how up to the All-Powerful Universal Mind or else to your Higher Mind. Part of learning how to detach is to not limit Universal Mind by thinking that something is difficult or can't happen because if you think something is not possible, so will It. Since Universal Mind is Absolute, your mind is Universal Mind in Its entirety, so what you think, It thinks.
Thoughts such as 'what if it doesn't happen', 'why hasn't it happened yet' or 'what if none of this works' are the breeding ground for attachment, more so if you think that having these thoughts will alone keep your desires away from you. For this reason I want to share my experience in this regard.
I have found that even if I think such thoughts, my desires still manifest as long as I remain faithful to imagining what I want, feeling it real in that moment and taking the inspired actions that may arise naturally. For this reason, I have concluded that imagining and feeling you are already experiencing a certain condition in the present moment are more important than detachment in this sense. After all fleeting thoughts of attachment are only thoughts and as long as you don't become obsessed by them, they should be countered by what you are imagining. By approaching detachment in this way you, learning how to detach in fact becomes easier.
The last thing you want to do is stop imagining the fulfilment of your desire just because you can't get such thoughts out of your mind. And then when what you desire doesn't happen you think it's because you did not detach, whereas the real reason was that you stopped imagining. When I have such thoughts I just put them out of my mind and say to myself that all is good, all is done and go back to remembering my True Self. Admittedly, I tend to have such thoughts when visualizing for healing because the stakes 'appear' to be higher and the worry more exacerbated. Nevertheless, I have still experienced the fulfilment of my imaginings with great success as long as I persist. This does not mean that you need not learn how to detach, but rather do not become attached to its idea.
Now, let's get back to how to detach from the outcome because it does make the experience more enjoyable and simpler while also bringing your manifestation into 3D physical reality in the shortest amount of time. When you are truly detached, there is no sense of desperation because you have access to your true will power. But not the kind of will power that is generally associated with forcefulness, self-control and overcoming obstacles.
In contrast, true will power does not require force. Your True Will belongs to your True Self. And as your True Self you gently declare a 'thing done' through the power of knowing your oneness with The Absolute that is your God Self. When you consciously imagine what you want to create, you declare that what you have imagined is done without any need to force anything or anyone. Where is the force in 'thy will be done'?
This, however, must not invoke arrogance within you because arrogance and pride are extremes that in time will be subject to the Law of Rhythm's swing and cause you to 'fall'. Remembering and being your True Self is accompanied by a sense of joy and unconditional Love for all because you know that everything and everyone (including the physical you) is a projection of your mind, in the same way that a dream is but a projection of your consciousness.
Think about it, if you truly knew and believed that you create your own reality, and that through the power of your imagination you could create for yourself and others anything you may desire right now and even better, would you be attached to anything or anyone? Of course you wouldn't.
If you truly knew and believed that your physical 3D world is but a projection of your consciousness in the same way that a dream is and that nothing is 'real' because everything is an illusion that is subject to change through your imagination, would you be attached to anything or anyone? Of course you wouldn't. Well then what's left for you to do is to know, believe and detach!
This step on how to detach completes the creative visualization technique itself, leaving the sixth and final step in the process which is to take new inspired actions in the Physical Plane where called for, or else to stop taking a certain action altogether: Taking Inspired Action for Manifesting.